The Girlfriends' Guide to Underthings

This post is sponsored by Soma, a company we love and trust. 

Ladies, we’re not going to sugarcoat it. The state of our collective unmentionables drawer has been … lacking in recent years. You could probably trace it back to that first pregnancy. We remember strolling through the maternity clothing store and being mystified by maternity underwear. Shirts and pants, obviously, and we outgrew our bras by the end of the first trimester. But why would one need maternity underwear? We might’ve rolled our eyes and muttered something about stores trying to sell eager, first-time moms something they don’t need. Of course, immediately afterward we went and registered for a wipe warmer and two different kinds of shopping cart covers.

We kept on wearing that non-maternity underwear straight up through month nine. They stretched to keep pace, and we patted ourselves on the back for our practicality. We see you, pregnancy marketing people. Can’t pull one over on us!

It was right around the two-month postpartum mark when we realized our mistake. The bleeding had finally stopped and we were able to put the canoe-sized pads away, along with the granny panties we’d sent our husbands to buy in a six-pack at Target the day we came home from the hospital and realized how much we missed those fabulous mesh panties. The baby was napping (in the bassinet!) and we’d just taken an actual, hot shower. We reached for a pair of regular underwear—an old favorite—pulled them on and … they promptly dropped right back down to the ground. Turns out, all that stretching they did was a permanent adjustment and maternity underwear is not a marketing scheme but an actual thing you should buy to avoid ruining all of your underwear.

Lesson learned.

Thoroughly discouraged, we made do. After all, when you’re a new mom, self-care is a hazy concept and the last thing you want to do is set foot in a lingerie store to replace the entire contents of your unmentionables drawer. Plus, we planned on more kids and what’s the point of replacing it when you’re gonna need the stretched out stuff again at some point anyway? Then suddenly, we looked around and realized our youngest children were potty-trained and in their own brand new underwear, and we were still rocking the same sad, droopy drawers.

It was not our proudest moment.

While we’re confessing, let’s talk about bras. True story: at our Sacramento book launch weekend, we could not stop gushing over Anna Jordan’s adorable maxi dress. The dress was slightly low-cut and a bit open on the sides, and would’ve been perfect over a pretty lace bralette (like this one). But that’s not what Anna wore. She wore a nude nursing bra. Friends, Anna’s youngest child will soon be two. She hasn’t breastfed in almost a year. She has zero need for a nursing bra right now.

Her explanation: a shrug and the following statement, “it’s comfy and it fits. Sort of.”

Oh, sisters. Don’t we deserve better than a bra that “sort of” fits? Motherhood is a crash course in humility; we know this. We are, quite literally, brought to our knees daily by these little people we are in charge of. We might have yogurt from breakfast on our shirt and applesauce smeared on our yoga pants, but dammit, haven’t we earned a bra that brings the girls up where they belong? Can we get an amen?

Enter: Soma. Their pretty underthings are just the rejuvenation your lingerie drawer needs. With bras in sizes from A to G, you’re bound to find the right fit. Not sure what your fit is? We feel you. Pregnancy and breastfeeding can completely change your size and shape; most of us are wearing bras that are the wrong size and don’t even realize it. At Soma, you can have a consultation with a trained bra fitter who will measure you and make recommendations based not just on size, but also on style.

We were also thrilled to discover their line of no-show panties, because we’re finally old enough to admit how uncomfortable thongs really are. Soma has truly mastered the art and technology of creating practically-invisible panties that stay where they should. Our underwear collection is officially droop-free, and we couldn’t be happier.

We know what it's like to be a busy mom who puts herself at the bottom of the priority list more often than not. But if you just registered your youngest child for kindergarten in your nursing bra because it’s the only one in your drawer that “sort of” fits, maybe it’s time for an upgrade? 

Keep scrolling for our personal reviews, a link to 20% off your purchase, and a chance to win $250 to Soma!


- our favorite soma products -

Name: Ashlee Gadd

Body type: petite, small-chested

Looking for: pajamas that are not maternity sweats, undies that don’t give me muffin-top, a bralette that also provides support.

Favorite Soma Products:

1) The plunge lace bralette. Since I’m small chested, I can get away with wearing bralettes as real bras. However. Most of the bralettes I’ve tried tend to stretch out after a few wears, and while I feel really comfortable wearing them around the house, I feel less comfortable wearing them out in public, especially when chasing my children around the park. The lace plunge bralette is awesome because it has real bra clasps, adjustable straps, and feels as secure as a regular bra. Perfect foundation for: low-cut dresses and v-neck tanks/tees. These bras do fit small, so make sure to check the sizing guide (I ordered one size up!).

2) The Embraceable Super Soft Hipster Panty. If you HATE underwear cutting into your hips as much as I do, get ready to fall in love with these bad boys. The lace at the top is crazy flattering, smooth against your skin, and gives a nice shape to your waist/hips. Five stars. Get them in every color. These are the most comfortable undies I’ve ever owned. Perfect foundation for: everyday play clothes, mom-ing, leisure and loungewear.

3. The Microfiber Boyshort. Somewhere between shapewear and underwear, these boyshorts are best described as a second skin. Three cheers for zero panty lines! Perfect foundation for: maxi dresses, maxi skirts, fitted clothing.

4The Lace Trim Camisole & Lace Trim Shorts. These are sexy AND comfortable (my favorite combo!). I wear them every single night and while I cannot prove this with science, I swear I am getting better sleep.

Name: Jennifer Batchelor

Body type: tall, curvyish

Looking for: a bra that can give some lift, a great pair of leggings, pajamas that aren’t my husband’s t-shirts.

Favorite Soma Products:

1) Lace Cropped Bustier. I used to think padded bras were false advertising. Now, two kids later, I’m like “give me all the false advertising, please and thank you.” I loved this bra because unlike a typical pushup that has heavy padding on the bottom half of the cup, this bra is lightly padded from bottom to top. It’s not overkill, but it creates a nice shape. No more gaping at the top of the cups and the style works underneath almost any shirt. Plus, it’s pretty while still being functional. 

2) Run Around Rose Leggings. I'm a standard black leggings girl (truth: I have three pairs), so the pattern on these would normally be a little outside my comfort zone, but I actually really love them. They're high-waisted for a little tummy control, thick enough to not be see-through, and great for working out or running errands. 

3) Cool Nights Lace Trim Camisole and Matching Shorts. I cannot overstate how much I love these pajamas. They are comfortable, sexy, and I don’t wake up sweating in the middle of the night anymore. I wish they came in every single color because I would buy them all.

Name: Lesley Miller

Body type: Tall, boyish build (as-in: no boobs, no hips, no butt, but I do have a stretched out tummy from babies!)

Looking for: Pretty pajamas, post-nursing bras

Favorite Soma Products:

1) Vanishing Edge Microfiber with Lace Hipster. I didn’t even know I was looking for these, and yet, they’ve quickly become a closet staple. After years of wearing thongs because I thought I had to, these undies might be the best invention since the epidural. (And I really like epidurals.)

2) The Plunge Lace Bralette. I recently finished nursing and I wasn’t sure what size my post-nursing boobs would be. I originally purchased this bra as a transition piece, but I’ve now officially fallen in love and wear this bra day and night. It’s perfect for under pajamas, but it’s also really pretty peeking out under a tank top.

3) Cool Nights Scroll Burnout Print Cami + Shorts. When I wear these, my husband thinks I’ve put on lingerie even if I’m just ready for a night of great sleep. I consider sexy but comfortable pajamas a total win in this stage of life.

Name: April Hoss

Body type: before baby: curvy on top, not a lot of back; after baby: … TBD (Hi, I'm 40 weeks pregnant).

Looking for: pajamas sexy enough for stay in dates without being full throttle lingerie, pretty bras, workout gear that's cute and functional.

Favorite Soma Products:

1) Cool Nights Tank/Shorts Pajama Set Spotted Rose QuartzI would love these pajamas for their softness alone. They could stop right there and I would be a lifelong fan. But on top of their texture, they are feminine without frills and very flattering. Slip into these after the kids go to bed and enjoy with your well-earned glass of wine. They pair well with evening plans that include staying in them or out.

2) Max Support Contour Underwire Sports Bra. Here is what I want in a sports bra: don't act like a medieval corset, don't give me the dreaded uniboob. Am I asking too much? Not according to Soma. This back clasp wonder keeps all its promises. Everything stays comfortably in place while you enjoy the freedom of working out as strenuously as you please. Put another way: you could chase your preschooler across a trampoline park in this baby without becoming the mom of bouncing boob infamy. Added bonus: adjustable straps.

3) Vanishing Tummy Modern Brief. Confession: I haven't tried on these panties yet because I don't want to make them suffer the aforementioned maternity stretch. But, I will tell you that in person they are soft and lovely and I have every confidence they will be a staple in my wardrobe come summer. I got a nude pair for all my summer whites, but I've already got my eyes on some darker shades come leggings season a few months from now. Adios, thongs from my twenties. I have endured you long enough.


Well there you have it. And good news! Soma is giving C+C readers 20% off their purchase now-May 31st. You better believe all of us are stocking up! Our underwear drawers have never been so happy. Just head to www.soma.com/coffeeandcrumbs to get your discount!

ANNNNND, that's not all! Soma is also giving one lucky reader a $250 gift card (!!!!). You guys. You could practically buy a whole new undergarments collection with that. Don't miss out! Enter below and we'll pick a winner on May 22nd. Good luck!